You should never have a major goal in life that consists of having everyone like you. It’s just not going to happen. If you struggle being a people-pleaser this article is not for you. This article is for those of you who have a problem being likable no matter what you try. Maybe you have Resting B. Face and have problems making new friends or finding dates. Perhaps you have a habit of coming off as a jerk when that’s not the real you. If you can relate, then here are 6 ways you can be more likable.
“Don’t wait for people to be friendly. Show them how.”
1. Be More Likeable By Smiling More
When you smile, it shows that you are not only confident but also approachable, friendly, and warm. People are more willing to open up to you and be friendly if you turn that frown upside down. Start smiling when you pass someone in the hall at work or when you are out and about. Smile when you meet new people. If you do, you will notice a major shift in how others interact with you.
Don’t feel like smiling? Do it anyway. Numerous studies and articles suggest that when you smile, you actually trick your brain into being happy. So the more you smile, the more you’ll genuinely want to smile.
2. Listen More and Talk Less
People love to hear themselves talk and they love when people listen to them. Be more likable by listening more and talking less. People feel appreciated and validated when you just listen. If you have advice to give, avoid giving it unless you are asked for it. You can show you are engaged in other ways such as paraphrasing what they are saying and asking follow-up questions.
Trust me if you do this, people will flock to you. People will appreciate your company and will want to spend more time with you.
3. Be Dependable
Be more likable by being a more dependable person. If you say you are going to do something or be somewhere, then make sure you follow through. People love others who are dependable. Think about someone you can count on no matter what. What feelings come up for you? Probably feelings of joy and appreciation for that person. You can be that person for someone else just by being there when you say you will.
If you find that you bail on people often, then you may need to consider whether you habitually say “yes” when you really should have said “no”. This can be a sign of people-pleasing or an inability to say “no”. You will find it difficult to be dependable if you are not comfortable setting boundaries or comfortable saying “no”.
4. Avoid Complaining and Judging to Be More Likeable
Do you like people who constantly complain and judge others? No? Me either and neither do most people. If you want to be more likable keep your complaints and judgments to a minimum. We are all human and we are going to do both from time to time, but do not make them a habit.
Stop talking about why someone may have missed work yesterday or complaining about your extra workload. When someone asks you how your day is going avoid telling them everything that’s wrong. Most people who habitually complain and judge have no idea they do it. Do you?
5 – Be Responsible For Your Mistakes
Always take responsibility for your mistakes. Be more likable by owning them fully. Apologize quickly and remedy the situation as best you can. Being a likable person doesn’t mean you are perfect and that no one will ever be upset with you. When the dust settles, what matters most is that you had integrity and you did what was necessary to right the wrong. You will be respected and well-liked if you know how to take responsibility for your mistakes.
6 – Go The Extra Mile
When someone asks for your help, and you lend it, go the extra mile for them. At work, even if it’s not your job, do as much as you can to solve the problem. In your personal life, go above and beyond to help someone in need.
I have a good friend Eddie, who is not only dependable but always goes the extra mile. Everyone loves the guy. Be Eddie.
If you struggle to make friends or interact with others in general, follow these six strategies. Be more likable by smiling more, listening more, and being a dependable person. You can also avoid complaining, taking responsibility for your mistakes, and going the extra mile.
Why is being more likable important to you? Let me know in the comments below.