Making friends and being sociable is an art that does not come naturally to some of us. Here is a quick guide that will help you make new friends and become a person who is easy to socialize with.
“The only way to have a friend is to be one.”
1. Let Go of Fear
Believe it or not, everyone at one time or another has had a fear of rejection when trying to make new friends. You can either run from this fear, or face it. The best thing to do is to gather your courage and forge on. The first step is always the hardest but once you take it, you will soon realize that things get much easier. In no time it will be easy for you to speak to new people and socialize in a group.
Recommended Reading: Is Fear Controlling Your Life?
2. Love Yourself
You cannot expect people to love you if you don’t love yourself. Work on your confidence, and build your self-esteem. Once you learn to accept your flaws rather than trying to “fix” them, you’ll feel comfortable enough to make new friends. The more self-conscious you are about something, the more it stands out. This makes it hard to focus on being sociable, which requires active listening and thoughtful conversation. How can you do this when you are too busy worrying about people judging you.
Recommended Reading: Self-Love: 101 Ways To Love Yourself
3. Initiate Conversation
There are so many things you could talk about depending on the type of environment you are in. Instead of always waiting for someone else to talk to you, start by approaching them and comment about something. A great way to do this is to give a compliment. A good compliment goes a long way as long as it doesn’t come off forced or fake. For instance, a lady complimenting another lady’s hair can be a good conversation starter. This is spontaneous and avoids those awkward small talk conversations about the weather.
4. What Does Your Body Language Say?
What kind of vibe are you portraying to the people who don’t know you well? Are you smiling, maintaining eye contact, and genuinely listening to them or do you seem moody and fidgety? It goes without saying that the former is more likely to make new friends than the latter. The minute people sense that they cannot trust you, or you are not being genuine, they will draw back. Show concern, actively listen, ask questions and try to really know the other person. Do this and you are on your way to becoming a good friend and a sociable person in general.
5. A Good Sense of Humor Doesn’t Hurt
Humor is arguably one of the best ways to get people interested in you. It shows that you are witty and sharp-minded. Try not to come on strong with your humor at first. As you become more comfortable with them let your true wit shine. Remember that first impressions count, so avoid making jokes that are at the expense of another person or in poor taste.
6. Learn To Give Second Chances
Mistakes will always happen, so learning to forgive will help maintain and make new friends. Learn to forgive yourself as well. So you tried to talk to a new person and ended up making a fool of yourself; don’t let this discourage you. Forgive yourself and try again. Maybe you said something that offended another person, ask for forgiveness and move on. If you do not learn to give and take second chances you may miss out on great opportunities at meaningful friendships that last.
7. Practice Makes Perfect!
The more you try to approach new people and get them to have a meaningful conversation, the better you will get. Let each experience be a stepping stone that shapes you into an expert at making friendships and socializing in general.
Some Tips
- Even though I encourage you to try to get out of your shell as much as possible, keep some of the mystery to yourself. Make people want to know more about you.
- Learn to respect other people’s privacy. You want to get to know them, but don’t pry.
- Filter your thoughts. If something pops up in your mind, ask yourself does this add to the conversation?
Yes, some people are naturally gifted at being highly sociable and can make new friends easily. These are few and far between, however. For most of us, it takes time, confidence, and practice. Follow these tips and stick with them and you’ll make new QUALITY friends. Give it a shot!
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